conflicted....

heh...it's been awhile since i last posted a proper entry....i tried complaining about the fact that my grandpa has been staying over our house for three weeks and sleeps in my room. i want to write about in in blogger...i tried...but halfway through writing i felt ashamed of myself. i know a blog is where you express your feelings and all, tapi sik sampei ati mok komplen pasal nek aji sitok. i seriously feel like anak derhaka or something. i just feel guilty for being unhappy with his staying here. i'm so mean....you know, i remember last time when i was younger, he used to pick me up after my PAFA classes at school. and sometimes he'd stop by the fish market at Lutong to buy himself newspaper, and sweets for me, at the shop there. he doesn't do those things anymore. after surviving a stroke, he was't strong anymore. and ever since my grandma passed away, my mum said it's like he lost the will to live. she said he's changed completely. *sigh* i just feel like an ungrateful little bitch. don't mind me...i'm just spoiled.